The following questions are intended to guide you as you begin evaluating your feelings and the impact feelings have in your life.
Becoming aware of your feelings is a necessary step to changing negative feelings to positive feelings.
You may choose to print a copy of your answers and compare them with how you feel in a few weeks or months.
You might also consider starting a Feelings Journal, as a journal can be an important tool in assisting you to identify your feelings and where and when they are triggered.
May you be blessed as you begin your Journey of discovery—of "Self" discovery!
Note: There are two steps to the evaluation.
Step 1: Answer each question.
Step 2: Click the Show Discussion link after each question for helpful information on each question and how your answers relate to the Healing Feelings books.
Answers are not saved.
If you leave this web page before completing and printing it, you will need to retake the evaluation.
1. In communicating the language of feelings with others, my current ability to do this efficiently is:
This first question assists you in tuning in to how you communicate your feelings to others, which is often a challenge, but a necessary part of living.
Much of our feelings Journey is focused inward.
Communicating your feelings to others, however, will show a level of maturity in your ability to grasp the language of feelings.
When you become more efficient at sharing your feelings with others, it will signify that you have begun to correctly identify your feelings.
People will notice the change you are experiencing as you become proficient in the language of feelings.
2. If I stop to think about it, I can usually identify my feelings accurately.
The purpose of this question is to open your view to the reality that the majority of us are not very proficient in identifying our feelings.
Most people come from "feelings are something that just happen to me" rather than evaluating their feelings throughout the day, accepting responsibility for them in striving to create and maintain harmony.
As you progress along your Journey, you will gain expertise in the language of feelings, and new vistas will open to you.
This, in turn, will begin to awaken the Divine nature in you.
A technique used to help you focus on your feelings is to:
1) Take in a deep breath through your nose and let it out slowly through your mouth.
2) Take another deep breath through your nose.
Hold it three counts at the top of the breath, and then let it out slowly.
Relax throughout your whole body as you do this.
(Feel the stress and noise of the day leaving with each breath.)
This puts you in both sides of your brain so you don't have to "figure" out your answers.
Also, it's easier to reflect on your feelings without being overly influenced by events around you.
The aim of the Healing Feelings Team is to assist you as you establish behavior that promotes self-introspection, quiet time, and writing in your Feelings Journal.
Finding brief times throughout the day to focus inward is also key to maintaining your balance.
You may choose to utilize 30-60 seconds before you perform tasks throughout the day.
For example, pause 30 seconds before opening the refrigerator and reflect on what you are feeling, or stand up and examine your feelings for 60 seconds before turning on the television.
If the television is already on, turn it off during the next commercial break and focus your thoughts to how you are feeling about something unrelated to the program you are watching.
For additional information, please refer to "How, then, do we know what we are feeling?" on page 39 in Healing Feelings From...Your Heart.
As you apply these suggestions, you will be amazed at how proficient you become in identifying your feelings.
While participating in these exercises you also place yourself on the path of your choosing, rather than simply floating along where life takes you.
3. If I were to characterize the underlying negative feelings that motivate my actions and attitudes, they would be:
No Sense of Direction
I just don't Understand
Need for Approval
Not Enough/Not Good Enough
Need to Control
This question helps you to put into words the negative feelings that govern your current reactions to life.
Identifying these feelings is the first step in the process of resolving them—in changing them from negative to positive.
The 2009 Script will help you make this change from negative to positive feelings.
You may choose to utilize your Feelings Journal for listing other negative feelings you are experiencing.
When you are ready to Script those feelings, use the Feelings list in Chapter 17 of Feelings Buried Alive Never Die to find the positive replacement feelings.
The impact of your new positive feelings will energize every part of your day.
Then, as you continue using these processes, piece by piece your True Self emerges unclouded by the people, places, circumstance, or events around you.
Be prepared to feel a sense of empowerment as you continue working with the Script.
It has the ability to literally change your circumstances and your outlook on life!
4. If I could change anything in my life, it would be:
Taking time to write out specific things you would change in your life will assist you in formulating a plan for change.
It may be a relationship, a job situation, or a thought pattern you are striving to change.
Once your desire is written out, you can associate the negative feelings that hold you captive and replace them with positive feelings.
It will amaze you that by simply changing your feelings/thoughts you can change an entire situation or relationship.
5. If I were to describe my relationship with my __________ it would be:
Relationships are frequently blamed for how we feel.
Challenging relationships can be healed, however, as we see the relationship from a new perspective.
It is imperative that we remove the responsibility for how we feel from others in order to liberate our True Self.
We are not defined by others or their perception of us.
We are defined by our Divine heritage and our own feelings.
Relationships greatly improve as we quit blaming someone else for how we feel, look to our Self and take responsibility for our "less than glorious" feelings.
We can Script to bring positive feelings into our life.
We can learn to forgive others for their misperception about who we really are.
Review chapter 9, "Liberating Your Self", and chapters 15 and 16 on Forgiveness in Healing Feelings...From Your Heart for additional insight on healing relationships.
This Journey will once again take you inside your Self. As Dag Hammarskjöld states, "The longest journey is the journey inward."
6. When I enter a room full of people I don't know, I feel:
Center of Attention
Out of Control
Wish I Wasn't There
How you feel about your Self and your perception of how others see you, can have an undesireable influence on your actions.
On one side you may feel uncomfortable around others who welcome and are open to you.
On the other hand, you may feel compelled to be dramatic and compensate for how you feel, with bravado.
As you might understand, it's easier to remain focused on how you feel when you are alone.
Nevertheless, when you are with others, keep in mind that You define who you are and how you will act.
In Healing Feelings...From Your Heart there is an exercise that is worth repeating here.
"During your daily activities, see your Self sitting in an auditorium as part of an audience watching your Self in a play—noticing everything you are saying and doing.
Then observe your reactions and your feelings while doing this.
By observing from the unique vantage point of the audience, you are decidedly more objective, for subconsciously you are not as emotionally involved...by Being the author rather than the actor.
From this vantage point you can write your own lines and specify what takes place.
You don't have to re-act.
All you simply do is shift your view point."
You can even look at your Self as the Director of your life.
Focus on your feelings and Script appropriately, based on your view from the Director's chair, instead of reacting to situations based on others' plans or desires.
Of course, once you have determined your course of action you still need to act—to respond—to move forward.
So...just change your point of view by feeling comfortable around anyone or in any situation.
7. When I get angry, the thing I would most likely to do is:
Spout off with words
Punch someone or something
Go spend money on myself
Destroy whatever is nearest to me
Start throwing things
Go be by myself
Confront the source
Anger has many sources.
We can be angry at others, our self, or even God.
In fact, when we do become angry, the "root" is usually found within our self--something we did or didn't do!
Anger often represents our inability to step back and view a person or situation from the Director's point of view.
When we can develop a non-emotional viewpoint, or an infinite view, we will quickly realize that the importance of a single relationship or event does not define who we are—Our True Self.
When we don't address our anger we get "stuck."
We aren't able to move forward and resolve our other feelings due to the anger energy standing in our way.
Anger is often the symptom of numerous unresolved feelings.
We may not even know why we are angry until we take time to reflect, "peel back the onion," dig to the "core" of those feelings, then resolve them. (Scripting)
For example, a mother may yell at her kids frequently without realizing that she's doing so because she feels so poorly in another area of her life.
Spending quiet time getting in touch with the source of our feelings will improve our relationships and heal the core issues instead of just treating the symptoms.
Forgiveness is key to resolving feelings that lead to anger.
Forgiveness of Self is a good place to start.
Please refer to the chapters in Healing Feelings...From Your Heart for additional information on Accomplishing Forgiveness.
Pay particular attention to Wild Bill Cody's story.
Seeing from a Director's point of view, and Forgiving will hasten the resolution of any remaining anger and speedily expedite healing on the Journey to your True Self.
8. When something goes "wrong" I usually:
Want to blame something or someone else for it.
Am willing to accept and "own" my responsibility in the matter.
Just "blow if off" or ignore the situation.
Say, "It doesn't matter."
Often feel very sorry about it.
Blame is a convenient habit for those who do not accept their responsibility in life, or for those seeking to distract someone from their own issues.
Please see the chapter titled "Who's to Blame" in Healing Feelings...From Your Heart for an in-depth discussion on this topic.
9. Every time I think I'm going to move forward in my life, I seem to hit a brick wall called:
Fear of the Future
Fear of Success
Fear of Failure
I'm not enough
Hopeless or Helpless
Victim or Martyr
Much like question No 2, identification of the negative blocks we face is the first step in removing them and replacing them with positive feelings, thoughts, and energy.
Keep in mind that it is not as difficult as some would have you believe.
Simply identify the negative feelings, then, use the Script to resolve the negative and replace it with the positive.
10. The area of my life in which I'd most like to see improvement is:
Note: Rank the importance of each for you with 1 being most important
Focus is needed to obtain an objective.
By selecting which area of your life you would most like to improve and focus on first, you are able to hone in on the feelings and issues you face.
To tear down the wall that has built up around your heart in one instant is not generally how healing works.
As you remove the wall, brick by brick on your journey (each brick representing a feeling), you will re-discover your True Self.
11. If one word could describe how I would most like to feel on an on-going basis, it would be:
Identifying the positive feelings we most desire allows us to Script them into our lives.
As the Director of your life you determine the outcome of each scene.
This question may also reveal to you areas where you need to Journey inward to discover why those positive feelings are buried.
12. Evaluate your current lifestyle in these areas:
Note: 1=Never, 2=Sometimes, 3=Half the time, 4=Usually, 5=Always
It is easy for me to share my feelings with others
Gauge where you are presently on these questions.
Set aside time to write the Script to Direct your life to where you choose.
As you progress along your Journey, return to these questions and see what amazing progress you have made.
13. If I were to list one word each for my 7 greatest weaknesses, those words are:
Identification of your perceived weaknesses will enhance your ability to see where you are currently in your life.
As you re-discover your True Self on your Journey inward you will come to realize that your weaknesses are blessings.
Your weaknesses will be the cause of your growth and learning.
They can be the catalyst that opens the door and leads you to turning them into your strengths.
You are unique and your challenges are uniquely designed to bring you to the truth of your Divine Self.
You can choose to overcome your weaknesses.
In his book Prison to Praise, Merlin Carothers teaches that individuals who praise God for their weaknesses will receive enlightenment as to the purpose for those weaknesses.
Growth then occurs, not always in the removal of the challenge but, in the way the weakness is perceived and reacted to.
Our weaknesses are our greatest teachers.
By developing infinite vision and humility we can grow from our weaknesses.
14. If I were to list one word each for my 7 greatest strengths, those words are:
We definitely benefit by recognizing our strengths and being humbly grateful for them, as they are what carry us through the challenges of life.
God never gives any of us a "stacked deck"—one in which we have more weaknesses than strengths, or vise-versa.
Therefore, it is extremely important, while in the process of learning from our weaknesses, that each of us move forward in life utilizing and exercising our strengths, and allowing them to be the rudder that keeps us on course.
While doing this—utilizing our strengths—these strengths are not only a blessing to us individually, but to everyone who shares in our life.
15a. If I only had 6 months to live I would enjoy:
15b. If I only had 6 months to live I would stop doing:
The two parts to this question will help you quickly strip away the mundane and non-important things in your life.
Treating each day as a precious gift allows us to focus on the feelings and relationships that are most important—and make a difference.
16. I hope to gain/understand the following, on my Journey to discovering my true Self.
Go to your outcome!
Go to the place where you have already gained what you hoped to gain.
That is, see your Self and your life the way you'd like it, in the now.
Be there by feeling how you know you'll feel.
Be there with what people are saying.
Hear what they are saying.
Be there with what you are doing, what you are smelling, what you are seeing, what you are hearing.
Do this often, very often!
Always engage your five senses while putting your Self there, as though it is happening NOW!
Choose how you feel, how you are healing, and how you choose Be-ing.
You may find it supportive to review chapter 16 in Feelings Buried Alive Never Die, where you are reminded that none of us are perfect, in the eternal sense of the word, and that by simply Be-ing your True Self, you can experience peace.
The purpose of this Self Evaluation is not to cause you to over analyze your life.
The purpose is to guide you on your individual Journey to the understanding that you are perfect just by Be-ing you.
We trust that you have enjoyed taking this questionnaire as a first step on your Journey to discovering your True Self.